Grief is such a strange creature. Sort of like a kitten that creeps up on you, pounces, finds a comfy spot in the sun, then dashes out as if it was never there. In the last year death has come into my life many times. Pangs of sorrow come afresh from a year ago when just before Christmas two young boys died tragically in a car accident. I grew up with their parents. I can not imagine the suffering they must have gone through this past year. I know they have a strong faith and that they believe their children are with God. I believe that too. I think grief is more selfish. We sorrow for ourselves that we can not touch, hold, or hear our loved ones. Our memories become bittersweet and weigh heavy on our hearts.
This last week a friend of mine passed. She gave me great inspiration. She was one of those nurturers that quietly nurtured everyone in her life everyday. She sacrificed her own comforts to help others because she wanted too.
Why do nurturers feel they must sacrifice their happiness in order to care for others?
I don’t ask this because I felt my friend was unhappy. When I saw her a few weeks ago she was very happy and enjoying her life. I suppose sometimes I felt I have sacrificed my happiness to meet the needs of others. I learned from my friend that you can find happiness wherever you choose. She chose her happiness in giving every minute to taking care of others. She had four children and a step child that she raised. She survived infidelity and teen moms. She took care of her grandchildren mostly for free and then in the last few years she was caring for her mother. Her mother was at the end. One morning my friend did not wake up. Her journey is new and joyful for she is no longer an angel in the flesh but now among the legions that serve us behind the scenes. Her nurturing is eternal.
May you find peace in remembering all those who have gone home, especially those nurturers who were angels among us and continue their angel work on the other side.