Semi-Hibernation Awesomeness #3 Keeping in Contact

Snow flurries cascading through sunlight on the first day of spring sing feathery songs to lighten winter’s hold.  Hearts lighter we sift through sleepy fog filled thoughts, moving from detail to detail and pondering hope;  hope of today, hope of tomorrow, hope that the soil will thaw and we can plant seeds of nourishment, hope that crocuses will soon appear.  In all this hoping the flurries have stopped and steel grey filters daylight over naked trees preparing to bud.

I wonder on this precipice of bursting about the nature of virtue.  What is virtuous? After all the Apostle Paul said to seek after it.

The grey is parting and the softest blue revealed as the flurries descend again so tiny you can hardly notice them unless you really look.

Virtue can be defined as morality, valor, merit, chastity, character, decency, goodness, honesty, integrity, excellence, distinction, and value, holiness modesty, purity, sacred.  What is good?  What is moral? Different perspectives define each differently.

Our power, our virtue,  to do good through unconditional love is more than an emotion.  It is power.  It is creation.  It is a state of being.  When we love ourselves, we do not judge or blame ourselves, we accept responsibility for our actions (Don Miquel Ruiz).  Then we must not take anything anyone says or does personally–which means we don’t feel sorry for ourselves or react selfishly (1).  We love without fear and give 100% of our love without expecting anything in return (2).

As we awake from our semi-hibernation let the unconditional loving virtue of friendship raise us from our disconnected depths and connect us with each other.

When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to  us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or  cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and  tender hand.

Henri Nouwen


Ten ways to Nurture Friendship

1.  Don’t criticize, condemn or complain. Write it out and keep it to yourself.

2.  Take Winnie the Pooh’s advise and do nothing together.

3.  Respect competition, collaboration, opinions, choices, perspectives.

4.  Think before you speak.

5.  Let others know how valuable they are through eye contact, touch, body language, tone of voice.

6.  Forgive.  Forgive.  Forgive.

7.  Take interest in their interests.

8.  Listen.  Listen.  Listen.

9.  Simply avoid arguments.  Kindness in thought and deed.  Agree to disagree.  Admit your fault.  Discuss differences in person.

10.  “How can I help_____to be the best he/she can be?”  (See 1-9, especially 6 and 8)

May you thrive in your friendships, thrive in your spring, thrive in your awaking to a new season, and thrive in your virtue.

1)Ruiz, Don Miguel. The Four Agreements.

2) Fish, Melvin C.  The Power of Unconditional Love.

3)Carnegie and Assoc.  How to Win Friends & Influence People in the Digital Age.

4)Gabor, Don. How to Start a Conversation and Make Friends.

5)Gallant, Janet.  Simple Courtesies, How to be a kind person in a rude world.




About jjbailey

Professional Parent, Author, creative homemaker, and endangered species.
This entry was posted in Caregiving, My Life as an Endangered Species, Nurturing and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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